All of my older posts related to Johnny's are here: my_kawaii_girl. All the other stuff is semi-friends only or just for myself. I write mostly about different fandoms I'm currently crazy about. If you wanna friend me, for whatever reason, I'll probably friend you back (leave a comment here, I'll get back to you - comments are screened). Oh and ignore the tags - they are a mess and I use them primarily for my personal fun.

Well, hello my dearest friends. I've been MIA for a while now, all thanks to my school duties. Currently, I'm in the middle of an exam session: with 4 exams and 2 tests gone, three to go + a paper to write, and other three pushed back to make-up session in March due to conflicting schedules. The results are pretty amazing actually: I got a 5 and 4,5 from exams and all 5s from tests. Cool, huh? Let me also tell you this - I finally sorted things out with the administration and I'm officially a student again. Woo hoo.

So all in all, I've been pretty happy lately. Yeah, studying sucks and I almost never sleep anymore nor eat (except for weekends, so I'm piling on a huge dinner now^^), but I'll be done in a week and then I'll be all free to do what I want.

I don't know if all that book stuff made me serious or something, but I wanna write today about an issue that deeply moved me - a story of a 16-year-old Lee Eun-ji, a girl who committed suicide after losing 40 kilograms in three months and talking about it on the SBS TV show Star King. It all happened back in 2007.

( Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder )

I've been stuck in this dump for over a week now. Voluntarily. I'm playing family with my family. Considering that back in the city I still live with my parents, the way I see it, it's a compensation in advance for the rest of the year, which I will most likely be spending confined in my room or at trolit's.

Yesterday I occupied myself with staying as much away from the sun as possible (thank God it seems a lot colder today) and creating new games aka some mixed rankers. The first one is with DBSK & Super Junior & Big Bang & 2PM (hence the name - kboys ranker), the second uses Korean girls/singers: SNSD or Girls' Generation (whichever you prefer to call them) & Wonder Girls & 2NE1 & Lee Hyori. Uploading pics took forever with my crappy net connection here. But yes, I'm bored. I'm gonna post my result later in the day.

Okay, it's starting to rain. Enjoy =).

( Kresults extended )

( Jresults )

Inspired much by raneczka, I've finally brought myself to do a meme, which makes you list top 10 Asian people / things you like. Since I simply love doing my personal rankings, this meme is just right for me. I decided to start with the easiest - my favorite Asian females, for two reasons:
• I knew there wouldn't be many to choose from, so
• I wouldn't have any troubles limiting myself to just 10. Gosh, it's gonna be so much harder with the guys...

( Top 10 girls )

This has to be one of the lamest pick-up lines I've heard. Directly. But if it's Big Bang then... No, sorry, it's still lame. G-Dragon solo with that freakin' adorable smile of his? Okay, yeah, maybe. Actually, who am I kidding?

( My lips like sugar )

Jack Bauer has the longest days of his life and last week was definitely the longest week of mine. But I've got a tiny break now and I'm happy. See, I don't really need much to make myself happy. I can sleep and eat like a normal person (yay!), listen to songs I'm currently obsessed about (finally got what the fuss was all about with Mirror, it's amazing), watch SuJu's PV of It's you for the hundredth time or OMG maybe even their performance.

( Good luck with the coma )

Time flies so fast, it's such a shame. I spent the last 3 and a half days living and breathing SuJu. It was like they moved in with me, all 13 of them, along with a certain friend of mine ^_^/~. And I'm bewitched. Not only I can finally name them (yay me! though I'm sure my pronunciation sucks), but I can proudly say I like them all. Yeah yeah, even the ones I found retards or an embarrasement of a human kind earlier. And don't get the wrong idea, I'm usually extremely strict with people. What can I say? Other than that they won me over completely.

( You.. when you... )

Sometimes it feels like it was yesterday. We graduated high school, saying goodbye. That feeling that you get at seventeen or eighteen that nobody in the history of the world has ever been this close, has ever loved as fiercely or laughed as hard or cared as much. Sometimes it feels like it was yesterday and sometimes it feels like someone else's memory.

We were here.
Guess what. Things change.

She is destined for greatness. Actually she's already great. I remember the first time I met her...

Hi.
...
How long has it been?
Two years?
No, it's been longer than that. I missed you.
I have someone now. I’m with someone.

Hi, it's me. Yeah, I'm sorry. I know it's late there, I just... What happened to us? You know? I don't know who I am anymore. Or how I got here. I miss who I used to be. I wanna have a home again. And real friends. You know, the kind of friendships we used to believe in. I miss that. And I miss you. I guess I just miss all of it. Does any of that make any sense?
Yeah, it makes all the sense in the world. Four years ago, it all seemed so clear, didn't it? Conquer the world, save the world, live happily ever after.
Are you happy?
Sometimes. Not always. Are you?
No.
Okay, then let me ask you something. What is gonna make you happy? Is it how you look? Or the car you drive or the people you know? Is it money or celebrity or power or accomplishments? Because I have all those things and I don't think it's enough.
Well then, what is?
LOVE, I think.

I have a more important question to ask you. What happened after he finished his book?

Hello?
Hey. It's me. Um... I know it's been a while, but I'm having a book signing in LA in a couple days and...
Yeah I know. I mean, I read about it.
Yeah. I'm pacing the house for the last hour wondering if I should call. I just... considering how I left things.
No, it's okay. It's actually really good to hear your voice.
Yours too. Well, I was hoping... I'd love to see you if you're not too busy.
Um. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Sure, I'll be there.
It's great. Well then, I'll see you soon then.
I'll see you soon.

Seems like another life.

Why did you came back?
I guess I was looking for that inspiration I felt when we wrote out our names here, you know. I was fearless then.
So what happened to that girl?
That girl...

Life happened.

Unless that's not really why you went home...

Are you gonna do it?
I met her tonight. She seems wonderful. How long have you two been together?
Why didn't you come to the book signing in LA two years ago?
Look, I knew we weren't meant to be.
I should get home. See you.

I was there. I was so proud of you but we hadn't talked in a long time and I saw you with her and I figured you guys were together which clearly you are. I like her. I do but...

I wonder what's going to happen to us?

I... was taken aback by how very little I could actually do for her. What I can do for her...

I found out I'm not the one you're looking for.
I'm not the one you wait for.

That was all I could do for her, then.

And then I ran away, turning my back on my entire past, as though trumbling down. Before I realized it, I was racing, intent only on pedaling. And... I was remembering. M's irritating loud laugh. Y's face, trying not to cry. M's surprisingly sweet voice. Your smile.

I know I'll forget this all. Someday, this feeling would be gone.

Where had the sparking sea gone? I can't run away. If I run away now, it erases everything, even meeting you.

'You're fine', that was all I could say.

He's worried sick about you. So don't go off on your own. The reason I'm talking like this.. it's his fault. Save your thanks for Mr. Youth.

If you're going to fall in love, then start at Midosuji.

The question is, what should he have done? Because you don't judge by outcome, do you? You judge by a whole plethora of other, less clearly defined things. Under the circumstances that held at the time, what was the right thing to do?
( Simon Mawer, The Fall )

We were lost that day. We were stubborn and hurt each other. I watched you run off and disappear at Umeda Station.

Don't make someone wait for you. Just because you know someone will.
( Pooja Verma )

I'll search for you and hold you. Faster, faster, running after you. People come to Shinsaibashi for love.

It was the best of times. If only someone had told me.
( Californication )

Where shall I chase you to? North, to Minami Ebisubashi. I want to start our love over again from Midosuji.

As an adult I have often known that peculiar legacy time brings to the traveler: the longing to seek out a place a second time, to find deliberately what we stumbled on once before, to recapture the feeling of discovery. Sometimes we search out again even a place that was not remarkable itself - we look for it simply because we remember it. If we do find it, of course, everything is different. The rough-hewn door is still there, but it's much smaller; the day is cloudy instead of brilliant; it's spring instead of autumn; we're alone instead of with three friends. Or worse, with three friends instead of alone.
( Elizabeth Kostova, The Historian )

You looked back gazing at me. I can't forget your tender voice. Time has stopped. Though I think it might be too late, "Yappari suki ya nen".

Everything we do is a choice: oatmeal or cereal, highway or side street, kiss her or keep her. We make choices and we live with the consequences. If someone gets hurt along the way we ask for forgiveness. It's the best anyone can do.
( Pushing Daisies )

Today people are destined to meet. In that far, far western city. If you're going to fall in love, then start at Midosuji.

I'll search for you and hold you. Soon, soon, running after you. People come to Shinsaibashi for love.

An elegant story.